Once You Start Thinking...

...it's really hard to stop.

Well the University of Idaho officially turned me down yesterday. But it was the nicest letdown I've ever heard of. The director of the program spent about half an hour on the phone with me saying all kinds of nice things, including that they would love to have me as an alum of their program.

But not this year.

Well, I got all angry for most of yesterday and most of this morning. Happily, I managed not to say anything to the admissions lady while I was angry/disappointed on the phone. So no bridges have been burned.

Now I think I am calmed down enough now that I can think a little more clearly. Firstly, I hope they have scholarship money available next year. And lots of it.

Secondly, since I'm re-thinking things, I have begun trying to re-decide what I want to do. My options are a) to cool it and get more qualified before I begin my Executive education at the University of Idaho or b) find something else to do somewhere else.

Yvonne, the Executive Education Director, offered and strongly encouraged me to "let" myself learn more of the right kids of skills by volunteering to coach ("executive mentor" is what she called it) a team of undergrads who are competing in some kind of entrepreneur contest thingy; I don't know what it is really. She also wants to help me along for the next year or so while I become better peers with the rest of the group I would be studying with (who are all 45 and have been management for 7-15 years). She offered to meet with me personally on a recurring basis to discuss my current management and business planning. I am going to have to learn so much "business speak."

It's a sort of weird version of flattered (because she's offering so much and is clearly impressed with me) and annoyed (because she's not offering what I want and I have to re-plan).

Now I finally have a great time to say: "Missed it by that much."

My second option is Wayne State University. Many members of my family have attended this venerable institution (one of whom being my great-grandmother, whose diploma I proudly store in my parent's closet waiting till I have a "real" house.). The campus is right downtown near a huge Barnes & Noble and the Detroit Public Library and it's only about 15 blocks from where the Tigers play ball and where traveling Broadway artists sing their songs. Wayne has a reasonably priced "Online MBA" that is completely online with twice yearly testing on-site. The tuition -- even now that I'm no longer in-state -- is actually cheaper than at the UI, but it doesn't include books (or airfare now). I'm fairly certain I could find a place to stay while I'm there, maybe even something to drive to get downtown. This program starts in September and it's fully online. I'll be applying tomorrow and making some calls on Monday to see if my financial aid will transfer.

There is always the proverbial tertium quid and more than just these two options. I could do neither and just crawl into a hole and not ever think about my job or my life again. I'm kind of ruling that option out. Besides, I also sent my "above average" GMAT scores to Harvard...